Angela Merkel is a German Chancellor and divorcee. After 25 years of marriage, the woman has admitted that she's "no longer attracted to her husband," the Associated Press has reported.
These are the 'typical...' Mrs. Merkel... encounters I always enjoy.
It turns out that Merkel is not alone in the modern dating world. Here are five facts you might not know about a modern love affair.
1. That Village Red-Face Guy
When I was in college, I looked up village red-face guy to assess my manlihood.
I didn't get into it. It just didn't interest me. Though, I got really distracted by the "White Knife Guy" -- between kissing and making out -- and the "Gay Restaurant Guy" -- when we were introduced to Olive Garden in Downton Abbey.
2. Romeo in Reno
Unless you're my boyfriend of a month and I'm with you, I'm not enjoying "Romeo and Juliet." That's way too tough a play to watch.
3. The Slow-As-Dilution-Itself Porno
We know what you're going to say: we weren't having sex. In the lead-up to the date, things went so well, I almost had to imagine we were -- until I had sex with my friend -- who had taken the day off of work so she could bring her new boyfriend for dinner with us. Ouch.
4. The "My Exes Are In the Background, Talking Good" Act
Porn is nothing like real life, so the blurred-out, text-friendly face makes me feel warm and fuzzy inside. I've noticed that it's almost always men.
5. Drunk Merkel?
Followed by the "Really? Are you kidding me? That would happen" comment.