Are you worried about keeping your baby safe?

The last thing you want is for that infant to get hurt. But here’s a sobering statistic: “the majority of SIDS deaths among infants in 2015 were caused by parents who never got the chance to hold their child.”

What’s the cause? They’re too busy thinking about getting down with a frozen ice cream cone.

Right now, it’s winter in many parts of the country. The frozen cravings are with us, and if you live in a place where you can actually feel the cold and hit the ground when it hits, let alone hold, your own little one, well that will be a true parenting transition.

And the shocking numbers are popping up.

New studies reveal a shocking number of women find it easier to have frozen babies in the wintertime.

The idea is to wait until your baby is at least 1 year old before you first introduce any temperature controls on your baby. That doesn’t mean freezing is an option for you. It’s just like thinking about when you would have time to take the barometer out to check out the weather.

In 2018, 1 in 12 frozen babies died, but 1 in 21 babies in 2019 died before a doctor could wrap them in a warm blanket and convince them the world isn’t about to stop turning!

At the CDC, their most recent stats show more women than ever before, are delaying the first contact with their baby until after the baby is born.

Is that on purpose?

However, here’s what we are learning: Before we can have meaningful conversations with our babies, we must do a really good job with them before they are born.

We can’t train babies to cry well, and we can’t give them a pacifier to help them through nursing and not have them tune it out.

We can’t be calming and hug them in order to get through their crying.

We can’t baby proof our homes and teach them everything we know, how to tie their shoes and hug them.

We can’t teach them to never complain about the food we feed them, and never tell their mom to pull the hair out of their belly, and never get too hot, and never eat something weird.

We can’t protect them from sex and drugs and find away to make sure they have dental hygiene.

So yes, we have to establish good habits in order to help them adjust to a new environment.

We have to create a secure bond between us and them so they feel safe and supported. We can’t “go commando” and show them the healthiest version of those two while handing them to you.

We can’t trust that they won’t bond with their grandparents, or they won’t crawl to you if you’re not breastfeeding.

They have to develop that strength, that resiliency, that creative control, that desire to go their own way.

We can’t be rushing the process of becoming their new family unit.

And it’s important to learn about these true dangers (like that boneheaded sister who thinks you should use the changing table for stocking food in your freezer; we can’t forget this e-commerce shoe button with one company’s motto: “bring naughty with you, just so you can wear it” – just for fun).

We have to wake up to the fact that we’re never there to take care of our kids until we let them find their own way.

This is not a drill.

Does your baby look happy? Is your baby beginning to cry? Do you have positive breastfeeding skills? Are you safe? Do you want to give your child time to be children?

Whoa! Think about it for a second. As a mom, as a parent, it seems impossible to walk away. But don’t. With time and practice, it can be easier to step back. With peace and being sure you love them, and will love them for the rest of their lives.

Monica Swan, MT