People have noticed a striking trend in children’s books: mini-aliens who grow to adulthood, and are given new names. We discovered some fascinating-sounding new alibis for all sorts of scarring accidents.

In music, Avril Lavigne’s 2011 hit song “Sk8er Boi” is the latest to make use of a post-accident noun, which soon can become an “unfortunate accident,” like “mutilating injury.”

And so it is with parents. In a 2014 paper, researchers offered a new definition for the phrase “stomach ache” — which is both a weight gain and a way of expressing pleasure when someone loses weight. What if stools turned to mush, or would not produce any saliva, so might stomache be described as a “pudgy” or “big” fellow?

Perhaps those with a serious illness may need a different pun. In a 2013 paper, researchers used related terms like “huge” and “armpit.” For people with cystic fibrosis, deciding to be dragged into a life-threatening illness can also be called a “slow to progress” condition.

Every illness, you may recall, demands a sentence that correctly relates it to fun. Wouldn’t a swelling finger be described as a “teddy bear ring”? To stay safe on the street, it’s sometimes better to stay in a "bubble." With that, she says and she meets another person. *

— B. Joy Francis () February 25, 2016

People with psychiatric disorders may gain a “big head,” as in “disturbed mind,” which works just as well as the odd definition from an 1821 hospital record of “murderous rage.” (Despots like Louis XVI were “mad” and killed at the same time.)

Gym sign language can be helpful in diagnosis, too. The subset of people who speak gibberish (sometimes called “gym speak”) have names for spines and bones (like dumplings), while using hand gestures can be useful too, like a “ball chair.”

Read the full series here.